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I had tried really hard up to that point to hold it back, honestly. I think part of me recognized that she was much smarter and more modest than me. This fire was burning in me, a fire that burned just like that second date: I was in love. Marriage, quicker than I was ready for, did this thing: it started sucking away that emotion. In other words, it was in the practicality that I found the love I was looking for. That fire I felt, it was simply that: emotional fire. I think that might be a big part of the reason the divorce rate is so high in this country. It’s time that we changed the conversation about love. Because until we do, adultery will continue to be common. I wanted to tell her on the first date, but I knew that would probably be weird. She kind of gave me this half-shy, half-amused smile. But as time has gone on, I also realized that she knew something that I didn’t. I tried so hard to keep that fire going, to keep that emotion alight, but it got harder and harder. And what was even more interesting was that once I realized this on a conscious level, and started trying to find more opportunities to give, the more we both, almost intuitively, became lovey-dovey. From the excitement of dating a woman I felt like I could marry. Imagine a whole nation of people constantly chasing the emotions they had when they were dating. That’s a recipe for disastrous marriages; for a country with a 50% divorce rate; for adultery (the classic attempt to turn the fire back on); for people who do stay together to simply live functional, loveless marriages. How many people are in pain simply because they’ve been lied to. Guys don’t like to be around people when they don’t think they’re at the top of their game. So just remember that his withdrawing is a result of him not wanting to appear weak or out of control and just allow him space for that.Next, make sure that you give him space Well, remember what I was saying before about guys not wanting to appear out of control or needing of help/support?” quiz and find out exactly where he stands…and what you can do to get things back on track!

So just remember: don’t try to solve and don’t take it personally.Finally, on that same note: Don’t bring up his stresses or struggles – he’ll bring them up himself if he wants to talk about them.On that same token, if he wants to talk about his stresses or struggles, just listen.Just be a well of admiration, appreciation, and love and give him the space to come around.Also, if you’re still unsure what’s going on in your relationship, then definitely take our “Is He Losing Interest?

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